To be the unquestioned best had always been my goal
But I have learned it is not in my future.
I am straying from my guiding path,
The only path that can exist,
The only trail that leads to my success.
Following one that does not, and cannot exist
It has been a beautiful lie,
A hopeful fantasy.
The ghost of a directionless road that I can only presume leads supremacy.
Meanwhile, in this arduous race,
I have been peering around to see how my opponents are doing.
It has distracted me,
And now I am behind.
Now I know that to win the race,
I must only compete with myself
For the only genuine champion that exists
Is the one who faces reality
And settles on a truce
To find inner peace,
To be only who he is justified to be.
My poem is so similar to this and I really connect to the idea. You share the idea in a really fluid way and it incited a lot of emotions. I really liked it!
ReplyDeleteI really like your message of not comparing yourself to others and only focusing on what you can achieve. Your wording is really effective, and I love the line "It has been a beautiful lie, a hopeful fantasy". The progression also flows really consistently. Good job! :)
ReplyDeleteSasha, so beautiful! It is such a raw and true emotion and feeling, and the message is so important and also one of the biggest ones that I took away from the Tao. "For the only genuine champion that exists is the one who faces reality" is both amazing and beautiful. Congratulations on writing an awesome poem.
ReplyDeleteI like the juxtapositions and contradictions that are presented in the first stanza. They illustrate the fact that if you compete with others, "...[you will be] behind"
ReplyDeleteThis was a really creative way to show this message of the Tao. I like how you connected it to yourself and made it personal. I also really like the lines "It has been a beautiful lie, a hopeful fantasy." It has a really nice flow and your word choice was powerful.
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